health

It appears I spoke too soon. I don't know where all my organs are located, especially my spleen. This is important because my spleen is swelled up the size of a 2-liter bottle of Coke. That's because I have Mononucleosis, or just Mono for short.

Other than fever, chills and a slight cough, it feels like I'm drunk 24-7. In theory this could be nice. In reality, Mono lasts between two to six weeks and, since it's a virus, there's no treatment other than a little R&R. So it's a good virus to catch if you're behind in your reading! I wonder: Is that why so many college students catch it? Or maybe it's because ...

These people are likely exchanging the Epstein-Barr virus

But seriously, everyone is exposed to the Epstein-Barr virus (the one that causes Mono) at least once in his or her life, usually when she is young and the symptoms aren't too noticeable (wasn't she sick half the time she was a child anyway?) or in her college years when people live stacked on top of each other and bodily fluids are quickly and easily transmitted. My theory? I got it from my roommate, who had Mono back when he was in college and thus continues to be a carrier of the virus to this day (though the host won't show any symptoms, the virus can periodically become "active" again in people who have developed an immunity). That, or too often sharing drinks with friends at the bar. That's a bad practice, folks.

1. What crazy ass fools would deny kids health care coverage? Would it shock you if I said the Bushies?

2. Maybe they had health care 14 million years ago. And now we'll be able to see!

3. Ha! Not to insult Prince Hal or anything ... Nice try, people, but we know Bush ain't no Shakespearean hero.
After the 2000 recount, plenty of us hoped - we really had no choice - that Bush would turn out to be Prince Hal in Henry IV, the layabout brat who, on succeeding to his father's throne, finds the maturity to lead. His presidency has indeed turned out to be like Henry V, but in reverse.

4. Health care in Ohio is screwed too, thanks to "the market." The profit motive runs contrary to the best cooperative and Samaritan traditions of medical practice and training.

5. Healthy food Less instantly bad for you food at the Indianapolis State Fair. Oh noes, they has to change the oil more often!

Um, dudes, that's a good thing. However, problem:
And if this meant they could indulge without guilt or have one more helping, so much the better.
No, see, the one more helping thing? You're missing the point.

6. OMG, the West Coast is so ... far ... away ... from East Coast newspapers, that is.

7. But not as far as Iowa, apparently. Not that the farmers help that myth, either.

8. Rain: It's messing with Mexico & Jamaica and killing people in the Midwest. (And freaking me out in Eugene: Give me back my sunny days! Until October!)

9. More disaster and a slow response: Peru needs help.

10. Kids these days! It's the annual Beloit list about entering first-year students, and it's a bit confusing:
62. They have no idea who Rusty Jones was or why he said “goodbye to rusty cars.”
Me neither, dudes.

BONUS: The Remains of the Day Lily
That just hurts. Ouch. Stop it!