Delphina
On Stephan Andresen: Punk plaid jeans by Lip Service; Paul Simonen shirt; Gladiator boots by Tuk. On me: Bite Me tunic by Switchblade Stiletto; Gerls Junkie Fit black stretch jeans by Lip Service; white leather three row silver pyramid belt; Drop Dead fuschia heels by Iron Fist. On April Smithart-Unruh: Zombie Stompers shoes; Monster Striped tube dress.
Modeling is hard.
That's what I learned on Monday night — among other things (I'm a large in Lip Service clothes, which are clearly built for skinny 17-year-olds. Lip liner can, in a pinch, become lipstick. It is possible for a pencil skirt to fit me). Turn this way. Bend at the waist, but stand up straight. Nose to the camera; chin down. Put your elbow out. No, the other elbow. Not that far. Hook the other thumb in your pocket. Be tall. Right shoulder down. Farther. Kick that hip out. Farther. Great. Hold that for 10 minutes. Now smile. “Being pretty is haaaard!†Stephan Andresen, the owner of Delphina, says, laughing. Forget being pretty; we’re just trying to stand with our feet in the right places. And these shoes are trying to slip right off my feet.
I'm not a model. Not by a long, long shot. But it was fun to pretend for a few hours, to have clothes tossed over a dressing room's curtain wall and to sit still while someone else straightened my hair and put on makeup on my face than I've worn in the last year combined.
I almost asked someone else to do this, but I'm glad I didn't. When I was talking to the owner of Delphina last week for this story, it came up that they do "lifestyle" shoots, where they put together outfits from their stock, making examples for those who, like me, aren't that good at matching their hook-and-eye pleather corset tops with steampunk skirts, or picking out the right pink heels to wear with skintight jeans. That, I thought, would make a different sort of illustration for a story: not a shot of the staff in their natural environment, but a photoshoot with their clothes. On me.
OK, the “me†part came later. I had to talk myself into it on the trip back to the office.
