lolcats

Think this poem could EVER reach the pages of the Paris Review, the New Yorker or even the UO's Northwest Review? Probably one in a zillion chance. Chances that this poem could be posted on the author's blog and be read by millions? Already done.

An excerpt:

LOLcat Wasteland

By Corprew Reed

1. IM IN UR WASTELAND BURYING UR DEAD

april hates u, makes lilacs, u no can has. (1)
april in ur memoriez, making ur desire.
spring rain in ur dull rootzes.

earth in ur winter, covered in snow
can has potato. PO-TA-TO.
INVISIBLE SUMMER! RAININGZES!
im in ur hofgarden, drinking ur coffeez.

at archduke’s haus, invisible sled!
im in ur moutainz, holding on tight.
no can has cheezburger.
oral sex metaphors in ur poem.

in ur stones, whar r treez? (19)
whar r bushez?
ceiling cat cannot say.
im in redrock, hiding from sunz.
commin ze redrock.
im in ur handfull of dust,
showing ur fear.
redrock, redrock.

(continue reading here)

Via Critical Mass

Y'know, I thought I wasn't getting enough LOLcats via my daily dose of I Can Has Cheezburger. But then I Googled "lolcats." Sure, there's LOLcats.com, but ... I've seen a lot of those, and it's a somewhat unwieldy page.

Enter Flickr. And tags. And (as of right now) 5,858 photos tagged with lolcat. Admittedly, a good number of the best ones are already on ICHC, and some of them just aren't funny (or aren't really LOLcats), but there are plenty to (heh, heh) paw through.

Good morning, Friday! With a pale, pale imitation of the Stranger's Slog and the Portland Mercury's Blog Town PDX, here's a tiny news roundup.

1. Rebel college students say, "Fuck your greedy lawsuits, RIAA & ASCAP!" Or more likely, they say, "Hm. I'll just go off-campus to a nice free wireless place and do my file-sharing anyway. And by off-campus, I mean the coffee shop a block away." But here's an idea:
Von Lohmann advocates a system in which universities pay blanket licensing fees directly to record labels to cover their students’ existing download habits.
All right! More fees for students!

2. Bridge rescue dude: The whole country is in love with this guy right now. And I hope that someone, say the Dayton Hudson (aka Target, and no, I'm not linking to them) people, gives the dude the money to get back into that auto mechanic training program he's interested in. You know?

3. Harry Potter is Christ?
Here's a convincing argument that Harry Potter is a Christian series? (Just in case you hadn't noticed how ... oops, sorry, no spoilers here.)
Warning: This column might make you want to read Dante's Divine Comedy. Who says the Harry Potter books aren't gateway drugs? I only wish I could reproduce the crazy Harry Potter/Christ comparison chart I found on Beliefnet. You'll have to go there yourself.

4. Crazy suburban development makes people happy!. Seriously, Oregonian, what in the world is this fluff? I mean, Bridgeport Village?! Oh, oh, wait ... it's all the fault of Californians.

When real estate agent Tom May wants to sell a home in Tualatin, a visit to Bridgeport Village usually cinches the deal. The new, glitzy "lifestyle center" is a big hit, especially with Californians who are excited to see high-end boutiques that are rare elsewhere in Oregon.
...
Yet, residents still don't have a central gathering spot like a community or recreation center. The city's downtown, the Tualatin Commons, holds a man-made lake surrounded by condos and apartments. But downtown has few restaurants and stores, and many people driving through the city do not realize a lake even exists.

5. Small town police are harder on illegal immigrants than Seattle police. What are the consequences?

One police officer says she enjoys working "hand in hand" with ICE. An attorney says, and I quote the article here, immigrants are being turned over to ICE even in cases where local police aren't prepared to bring criminal charges against them.

That's cheery. Maybe I'll end on a cheerier note. For instance, the Saturday Market corn guy will probably be there this weekend, which means yum. I mean nom.

Enjoy your weekends, people!